Nikki Yeager

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Craigslist Chronicle Volume 4: You Have to Email a Lot of Toads

Posted by Nikki Yeager on December 3, 2009 at 6:01 PM

The night I posted my craigslist ad was a good night. It was the single turning point in my dating life when i decided to proactively change things from "what if.." to "let's make some magic happen". Putting the post up was not only fun, but it was liberating. Like dating should be.

 

I looked at my well crafted ad and I thought to myself "Here comes my husband."

 

A few minutes later my inbox was popping up with response after response. I was excited, I was nervous.

 

Most of all, I was confident. This would be the moment I found love. In fact, I was ready to have so much passionate, enjoyable love in my life that I'd be overwhelmed with boyfriend prospects and have to start turning people away. After all,how could such a liberated, confident girl not end upwith a wonderful man. A wonderful man who, preferably, wanted 2 or 3 kids and a wife within the next 5-7 years.

 

Oh yes, I was on a roll.

 

So I opened the first email, smile on my face.

 

Until I read this. Here's email number one without a single alteration or deletion:

 

AYOAO OAOYOAY GOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

…………..,-~**~,…………,-`. _.`~,……………………………………………

…………/’(.===),\``\....,-``|. .(===).|…………………………………………….

…………\. `~~~`,-l::\--/::::\. . `~~`./-,……………………………………………

………….`-,. ,-``:::::::,-~~-,_`~-~`::::`-,…………………………………………..

…………..,-`::\\:://:::\: : : : : : :`````: : ::\………………………………………….

…………/: :\:::::::,-~`: : : : : : : : : :l`""-,.\...........All Glory To The Hypnotoad!

………,-`: : :`-~`: : : : : : : : : : : : : :\:::::`| \''\,…,…………………………………

……<,`,,__,,,,,,----~~~~----,_: : : : : `~~’..|:::\: `-,-~-,,…………………………

………….\. . . . . . . . ,,,__. . ``~--\: :,: : ::/../:::::\:_: : : \……………_,………..

…………...`-,. . . . . . . . . . ``. . . .,-`,-`: /.../-,:::::::::`~-,: :\.....,--~``::::::`~-,……

……………..\. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . `-,,,-`.,-`: :\::::::::\`~--`: :,.:::::::::::::::::::::`-,….

…………..,-``,~-,. . . . . . . . . . . . ,-~`,,-`,: : : :``~-,/: : ,-,,,/:::::::::::::-,,::::::::/…

……………\: :\`-,_`~----,,,,,,---`\\....,-`. . .|: : : : : : : : :\::::::::::::::::::,-``,,,-~`…..

…………….\: ,-\: :``~--,,,,,,---~```: . . . . .|: : : : -,: : : : \::::,--,._,,--`::,-`……….

……..,-----``,-`: : \:. . . . . . . . .`-,,-`. . . . .|: : : : : : `-,: : :`-`: :/``:::::,-`………….

……...``---,: : :’’’’’`-,`--,,. . . . . . . . . . . . . /``: : : : : : |: : : ,~`::,-~```,,_```~,……

……………``/: ,^,:<~-,_,-```~~<``,,```~~`: : : : : ,,-~````./::i~~-,,::`-,..``~--`……

……………./: /…`~,`~-,……,-~~``,--,-: : :,-~````……..`,,,/…….``-,::`,……….

…………….``………`-`…..`---```..,``,-~``…………………………..`~`……….

erm

20 years old

...............................................``` .................................................. ....

 

Which is why I don't [normally] date 20 year olds. I just don't enjoy kissing frogs.

 

Read Craigslist Chronicles: Volume 3

Categories: dating, new york

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2 Comments

Reply Melissa Coppola
07:11 PM on December 03, 2009 
hahahaha the best yet
Reply tuhin
05:12 PM on January 02, 2010 
i am waiting for the rest of the story :)

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